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10 Steps to Overcoming Fear: Public Enemy #1Subject: Overcoming fear, adversity, motivational, obstacles, leadership By Victor Antonio G. We can’t hide our failures let alone hide from them. It has been said that dentists’ mistakes are pulled. Carpenters turn theirs into sawdust. Doctors bury their failures and lawyers lock them up from the public view. When we fail, it seems as though the world is staring at us and gawking at our misstep. A friend told me a long time ago a saying that has always stuck with me and has served as a reminder about worrying about outside opinion, she said, “What you think of me, is none of my business.” Every time I get the feeling others are watching and waiting for me to make an error or mistake, I remind myself of this saying. Most importantly I remind myself that I am my worst critic. And that I have the right and ability to choose what failure means to me. Failure is determined by your chosen outlook on life. If something didn’t turn out your way, you have the choice of viewing it as positive learning experience or letting a negative experience rob you of your energies to move forward. Here are ten simple rules or guidelines for helping you deal with and accept failure as part of the success process: 1) Learn to appreciate the value of failure: Start believing that failure is there to help you get to your intended destination. 2) Don’t take failure personally: Like success, failure plays no favorites. It is color-blind, gender-blind and agnostic. 3) Allow failure to redirect you: Failures are like road signs directing you in the direction ‘you need to be going’ instead of the way you headed. 4) Learn to laugh at yourself and failure: Don’t take yourself so seriously. Learn to enjoy the process of growth and cycles of failure and success. When failure comes just smirked at it with confidence and say, “I’m gonna figure this out, just you wait.” 5) Ask and keep asking “Why?”: Always ask yourself why didn’t things turn out. Self-analysis and evaluation are key to learning from your failure and achieving eventual success. 6) Learn from failure: If you repeat the same mistakes over and over again you do yourself a dis-service. There is a saying, “The definition of an idiot is doing something the same way over and over again yet expecting a different outcome.” Growth is an iterative process of learning from our mistakes. 7) Don’t let failure beat you down: Failure will try to convince you to give up. Failure will try to demoralize and destabilize your intent on success. Don’t allow it. Think of failure as a help hand and not as a fist trying to beat your down. 8) Use failure to measure your growth: All steps toward success can be measure by the distance we have travel and the amount we have grown personally and economically. Remember, growth comes from action and experience, not from standing still and doing nothing. 9) Zoom back and put failure in perspective: We always see ourselves as the center and most important object in life. Zoom back and take the time to appreciate all the good things that are happening to you. Zoom back and be grateful for all the little things you take for granted. Zoom back and realize that the majority of people in the word do not have the opportunities we have here in the United States. 10) Never give up! The biggest mistake one can have and greatest failure a person can experience is that of giving up and not trying. Do not fear failure, fear giving up. The most pathetic state of human nature is one of total submission, of body and soul. What holds us back or paralyzes us from trying is the fear of failure. But here too is an irony, if we are too fearful to act then we guarantee our failure. The football coach Mike Ditka put it succinctly, ”You never really lose until you quit trying.” We must learn to view failure as a healthy process of reaching success. We must learn that failure is a guide to success not an obstruction. Please forward this article; share it with a friend who may need a few words of inspiration.
Victor Antonio G., a top business motivational speaker and author of “The LOGIC of Success”.
Copyright © 2004 by Victor Antonio G. All rights reserved. This article MAY be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, as long as the author’s name, website and email address are included as part of the article’s body. All inquiries, including information on electronic licensing, should be directed to Victor Antonio G.
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